Where I'm From...

In January, I started researching my family roots.  I have become so consumed with my search that I have not taken the time to do any writing or art work for months.   Those projects have been set aside. 

I have tried unsuccessfully to find a way to share the best of what I have found in my ancestry with my Georgia cousins.  We have a Family Reunion coming up in a week!   I spent most of the past two days trying to print what I have found.  I have finally decided that it is just about impossible to share that way because the family tree is like a real tree.  It branches out in all directions.  It is not linear.  And it's not about charts and names.  It's about real people with amazing stories.    

Native American Ancestry?

I cannot find any evidence of Native American ancestry and my DNA sample seems to match what I am finding in my search....100% European ancestry.   

This is a good way to get started:  sharing a photo of my paternal grandmother, Selma Swift, with three of her children. Closest to her are Howard and Agnes with Gladys standing behind her.  All three of these children have led long and productive lives, and they are still living.  I look forward to seeing them next week.    

This photo seems to support the story that Granny was of Cherokee Indian ancestry.  Doesn't she look like a proud Cherokee woman???   Many of my cousins and I have believed that we had that ancestry and though it is disappointing (and surprising) to think that we have been given the wrong information, the science proves that this is not true.  I don't have Cherokee DNA, but I have found many proud and intelligent people who are my ancestors.  We have ancestors who have touched the history of the world, so much more than I would have ever guessed and I can't wait to share all of that with them.

As an exercise in my Writing Group, I wrote this little poem from my perspective of growing up in the 50's.  Now that I have begun to research my roots, I realize that I am so much more than what is expressed in this poem.   I have much to share.  So hold on to your hats!  My Cawthon family is amazing!  And my Fairy Fort has now been stretched across an ocean and across many generations.

Where I'm From

 Paulette Whitehurst

 I am from Hand-Me-Downs and Making-Do,

from clotheslines filled with

cotton sheets and terrycloth towels

billowing against a cerulean sky.

From toddlers splashing in silvery galvanized

tubs filled with water from a green garden hose.

I am from front-porch-sitting beside

multicolored flower beds of zinnias,

marigolds, and roses with names

like “First Love” and “Climbing Mermaid;”

From neighbors who borrowed a cup of sugar or

the use of the avocado green telephone on the kitchen wall.

I am from buttermilk-and-cornbread on Saturday nights;

From plates piled high on Sunday

with fried chicken, speckled butter beans, and red ripe

tomatoes picked from backyard vines, from sugar cured

ham decorated with pineapple slices and cherries;

Better Crocker cakes with whipped icing.

I am from flowery wallpapered rooms with overstuffed sofas

and lamplight under fringed shades. I am from

country-music- harmonizing with albums on the Hi Fi;

Late night black-and-white movies with smiling dancers cavorting

Across the screen; sweeping soundtracks that picked me up

And transported me to a place of beauty. And possibility.

I'm in love with Georgia Heard's writing...

Georgia Heard tells us in Writing Toward Home to "Fall in Love at Least Three Times a Day."  She enumerates all the wonderful things in the world you could fall in love with including stars, birds, music, flowers, and....well, you get the idea.

So what are the things with which you fall in love?

Falling in Love Every Day

(inspired by Writing Toward Home by Georgia Heard )

I’m in love-

With warm bubble baths on a frosty day,

with hot chocolate in an oversized mug,

I’m in love with cuddling with my little dog,

in my favorite reading chair,

a book on my lap where I can lose myself

for just a little while under my grandmother’s

scrap quilt I escape to faraway places. 

I’m in love with a colorful jigsaw

puzzle spread across my dining room table

and a good movie flickering across my tv screen,

savory soup wafting throughout the house.

I’m in love –

With Spring’s pink buds on the dogwood trees,

the baby birds chirping in the nests of our

Pink crape myrtles.

With soft rains that bathe the earth and

leave sparkling puddles for stomping

and mud for squishing between my toes.

I’m in love with daffodils and tulips and the

Cool pastels that tease us with the

anticipation of summer’s bold colors.

I’m in love –

With summer’s dragonfly days

where basil breezes

lift my curtains

and sunshine spills across

the freshly picked tomatoes

lining my window sill. 

With firefly nights where children

Run through the cool rubbery grass

and play hide and seek while their

Parents sit on their porches with

Tall glasses of iced tea.

I’m in love -

With the cooling breezes

Of golden Autumn days and the invasion

of pumpkins and witches that fill the

spaces of the store shelves and windows

with toothless smiles and the promise of harmless fun.

I’m in love spicy scents that permeate

the bakery section of the grocery store

and the shiny red apples

that fill the bowl on my kitchen counter top.

I’m in love -

With the words that fill my notebook pages

Throughout the year, the careful drawings

That fill my sketchbooks and the watercolors

That splash across their pages.

I’m in love with books that line my shelves

And peek out from under my bed.

I’m in love with learning,

with the challenge of technology,
the ease of friendships, old and new,

I’m in love with interesting conversations

and friendly debates. 

I’m in love with my family,  my colleagues,

And the students I taught…

With memories of long ago

And plans for the future.

Fifty Things I Loved About My 50th High School Reunion - Cradock High School, Class of '65

1.  I loved the hugs!  All the hugs from people I had not seen for so many years.

2.  I love it that the Committee who has given so many hours of volunteer service planning our past reunions were willing to come together once again to provide us with a wonderful weekend.

3.  I love it that the Committee is planning to do this for us again in just 5 years!

4.  I love Ralph's steady and constant friendship with everyone.  He is truly one of the good guys.  (However, it is a bit disconcerting that he never changes--- never gets older like the rest of us!)  I guess Sandra takes very good care of him!

5.  I love my girls - Linda Perrot, Linda Rice, Darlene, Micky, and Gail.  It always fun to see them and spend time together.  Spending time with them is always good for the soul.  When we are together,  the years just peel away,  and we are teenagers again.

6.  I loved the music.  So many memories are triggered by that music that takes us right back to our high school days.  

7.  I loved the video that Dean put together as a tribute to our high school days and a tribute to  the classmates who were watching from heaven.  That is not an easy task, and I know he spent many hours working on this.  As I watched the still photos flash across the screen, I thought how appropriate that the photos were the way we will remember them forever.... young and vibrant, rushing through the halls to class, slamming lockers, laughing, teasing, dropping their books, cheering, playing football, dancing... That's the way I will remember them always.

8.  I loved riding with Ruth in the parade.  I don't think we ever had a class together in high school.  Not one.  Yet we had so much in common.  So much to talk about.... Looking forward to spending time with Ruth in the future.

9.  I love that Janet's husband laughed the entire time I talked with her.  He obviously found me to be quite amusing.

10.  I loved Sandy Styron's strong hug.  We have not seen each other for more than 45 years.  We ate lunch together every day Junior and Senior year.  We shopped together for our Jr.-Sr. Prom dresses  and came home with matching gowns.  She wore white like most of the girls.  Mine was identical, but it was yellow.  (That's me.... always the rebel).  Sandy was in my wedding.  If it had not been for Sandy,  I probably would not have attended college.  She infused me with confidence.  I love her smile and see it every day from her photo on my bookshelf.... even after all these years.

11.  I loved the conversations about our grown children and our love for our grandchildren. 

12.  I loved my teacher conversation with Vivian.  We both know the best kept secret of having a wonderful career---spending our days in a classroom.

13.  I love that Larry came to find me when we were all over the place chatting with everyone.  We rode the school bus together in high school.  In those days, kids rode the bus or walked to school.  Not everyone had cars as soon as they were old enough to drive.  Larry is another of the good guys.  

14.  I love it that we had so many good guys in our class.  

15.  I love that Teddy and I had a really good conversation.  We probably never even spoke to each other in high school.  Teddy and I have now become friends because of Facebook.

16.  I loved riding in the parade and waving to everyone.  It didn't matter if I knew them.  Just waving like a fool--- a fool who is so proud to have been a student in this class.

17.  I loved Nat's speech.  It was simple and yet so inspiring.  You can tell that he has been a leader all of his life.  His words touched my heart and brought me back to that place where we were in 1965, eager to make changes in the world, and like Nat, I still think we can do that.

18.  I loved it that Ruth could point out to me all the store fronts in the Square---"That's where the bakery used to be..... and that was the flower shop."  Such love of place is so touching.  It didn't matter that I didn't grow up in Cradock.  I was an Academy Park kid.  I could just relate to the "used-to-be" places.

19.  I love that I had a chance to see Alice at Afton Square.  Even though she didn't come to the events at the hotel, it was such a pleasure to see her and meet her husband, Chuck, who has been my Facebook friend for quite a while, even though we just met.

20.  I love that my husband was able to reconnect with some old friends at Afton Square....people he grew up with and played with every day in his Cradock neighborhood.  This put a smile on his face.

21.  I loved the hugs.  (Did I mention that?)

22.  I loved seeing Virginia and Tommy, two of my favorite people in the world.  I even met their daughter, Jennifer, at the parade.

23.  I loved watching everyone dance.  I can't do that myself.  But it is always fun to watch.

24.  I love that there were yummy desserts on Friday night, and I didn't eat ANYTHING, because I was too busy talking.

25.  I love that Dennis and Gail invited me to join them downstairs in the hotel restaurant with some other friends at the end of the night,  just to continue talking.  There's never enough time to say it all.

26.  I loved my conversation with Tim on Saturday about SOLs.  We have all the answers.  Why don't those in charge ever listen to good teachers who could tell them what's wrong with the system?  Tim and I were in Mr. Westler's American History class together, and we talked about how dedicated he was to the students.  Something I never knew.... Tim told me that Mr. Westler rode a bus to school every day when he taught us... all the way from Norfolk, because he could not afford a car.  He was one of my favorite teachers.  I was lucky enough to have him again for Government in Senior Year.  

27.  I loved that Nat came over to Teddy's truck to pick up the signs for the convertible he was driving with Miss Cradock (Virginia) and Homecoming Queen (Micky).  He got the signs and said, "I need a method of attachment."  LOL  (We found a bag with tape and rope so then he was provided with "a method of attachment."

28.  I loved my long talk with Elaine, a talented pharmacist, getting advice on  medications.

29.  I loved the table decorations, and my best buddy, Linda Perrot, who made them, said "Take one home at the end of the night."  Now my centerpiece is on the shelf in my pantry so I will be reminded of our reunion each time I go in to get a can of beans.

30.  I love that my husband, who didn't want to get a portrait done, changed his mind when he heard Ralph say that those photos would be included on the video.  He made a big sacrifice, smiling for the camera with me after the Sat. night dinner.  

31.  I love that we all crowded on that staircase to take a class photo.  It was like a giant hug crowded in together.  You could just feel the love of being there together.  

32.  I loved the humor on that staircase, getting some of the shorter classmates to move so they could be seen in the photo... the comments.... "Smile...show your teeth...if you have any."  

33.  I love the laughing.  

34.  Did I mention that I loved the hugs?

35.  I loved Bill's technology skills and the way he clicked around his phone and sent me the photo immediately!  I need to learn from you, Bill!

36.  I love that everyone was concerned for all those who were not with us for health reasons.  We missed each and every one of them and everyone expressed concern and hope that they would make it to the next reunion.

37.  I love it that I surprised Margaret Anne, Harold, and Linda Meads with photos they didn't know I had from 7th grade!

38.  I love it that several people invited me to come visit, and that I was able to invite many to come visit me at the beach. (always a lure!)

39.  I love that Nat lives in Charleston, and I was able to talk with him about one of my very favorite cities in the world and share stories of my childhood years living there in the 50's.

40.  I love that Nat's wife has a bookstore.  I could just camp out there and be perfectly happy.

41.  I loved riding down High Street alone when I left the hotel.  Roger was driving separately.  I drove slowly taking it all in.  My home town, where I once walked the streets with my mom, shopping for school clothes to put on lay-away.  I drove past the Courthouse where I worked after high school until I got married and moved to Richmond.... past the Commodore Theater where I remember standing in line with Roger while the snow drifted down on us.  We were bound and determined to see "Goldfinger"....  past St. Paul's where I first attended mass as a child and later with Roger for his graduation and his dad's funeral.

42.  I loved eating dinner with Gail and Dennis, Elaine, Marsha and Dixon, Harold and Kathy....  Such wonderful dinner companions.

43.  I loved seeing Charlene and Butch.  Butch and I have been friends since childhood when our mothers worked together.

44.  I loved Tim's blessing before we ate.  

45.  I love that my classmates are as fiercely patriotic as I am.  Was it the way we were raised or what we were taught in school?  Maybe both.  Is that missing in education today?

46.  I loved that Michael Koon wanted to take a photo with me at Afton Square.  Such a sweet guy!

47.  I loved seeing all the couples who married in our class,  Joan and Donnie, Earleen and David,  Virginia and Tommy, Gail and Dennis, Mike and Kathy......others?  They were so lucky to find each other and stay together all these years.

48.  I loved the promises.  Promises to keep in touch,  to visit,  to call each other.

49.  And the hugs....so many hugs.

50.  I love my life full of blessings.  So lucky to be a part of this group.  And I can't wait to see them all again. 

This is my life....

Somewhere over the Rainbow 

by Israel "IZ" Kamakawiwoʻoleand

Somewhere over the Rainbow

by Jewel

Love Letter

I still remember when I saw you for the first time.   Roger was 31. I was 28 yr. old. I had a 1 yr. old and a 4 yr. old. We were so proud of you!

In those days, working full time and attending classes at night to get my teaching degree, I had my hands full. You were there when I got my first teaching job. Remember that first morning when everyone came out on the porch and waved goodbye as I drove out of the driveway?

Remember how excited we were when we got that first color tv? Our first air conditioner? Remember how we all hung out in the family room where the window unit kept us cool? Remember how we painted and wallpapered over the years? And then pulled down wallpaper to re-paint later? Hanging curtains? Removing curtains? As I walk through your rooms now I hear the echoes of children playing, laughing, singing along with the radio and the record player. I remember when Betsey and Chris both wanted a copy of "Grease," and we made them share the same album? Remember those long nights of homework at the kitchen table? And the long nights of grading papers and lesson planning after the kids were in bed?

Remember the celebrations? Birthdays, holidays, first communions, family dinners? Remember the parade of friends that filled the rooms? Getting up in the morning to find teenage boys sleeping all over the floor? Girlfriends at sleepovers giggling late into the night? Tents in the backyard? What about those baseball games and swim meets we went to? Lots of conversations about those!

Remember when we decided it was time to update your looks? Pulled down that 70's paneling and replaced it with sheetrock? Crown molding was added and floors were refinished? Wow, how about that new shower with the Venetian marble and the glass doors? That was some fancy stuff!

Remember those sweet pets, so many of them. Fluffy, Brownie, Speckles, Lucie, Mike, Lilly, Gracie, Kitty Boy, and now Jack. Some of them still lie beneath the grass in the yard. Remember how some of them were not allowed in the house? Yet every time we got a roll of film developed, we saw photos of Betsey with the pups on the sofa? On the garage wall, Roger wrote their names and hung their collars. This brought me to tears when I saw it last week after the garage was cleaned out and ready for the new people to arrive.

Oh, and now the grandchildren? So it starts all over again! Little feet stomping through the house. Giggles. Noisy tv shows.... Toys littering the floor.... Only now we mark the door frame with their growth measuring each and every inch of joy we feel for having them in our lives.

Remember when Roger planted this tree? Wow, that was a long time ago! He pulled it up from the woods. Just a little thing. Look at it now.  And the fairy fort? It started as a herb garden and took off on a path of its own.

The grape vines are full this year. I guess cutting them back was a good move. And the gardenias that we thought had been taken by winter, are coming back. They were all rooted by my mother from her very own bushes. I hate to leave them. But I am sure they will provide beautiful blooms once again next year, bring pleasure to someone else.

It's been a long time, 42 years. You have provided us with shelter through snow storms and hurricanes, steaming hot weather, and freezing cold weather. And now as we leave you, we thank you. We thank you for taking good care of our family. We hope you are in good hands....as you will always be a part of us and have a place in our hearts.

Christmas is over, Jack!

It's that time of year....between Christmas and New Year's.  Life is a frenzy for us until the 25th, and then there's that big letdown when it's all over.  We're not "party people" so we're looking forward to a quiet New Year's Eve in front of the television watching the ball drop.  On New Year's Day, we'll watch the parades on television while we pack up our decorations and put them away until next year.

I am still struggling with my quest to declutter.   So this year, I will also consider letting go of some of our decorations.  Although, I doubt that will happen.

A few years ago, we bought a smaller tree.  We gave away our big artificial tree and replaced it with a more reasonable size.  The one thing I failed to consider when we bought the small tree was that all of my beloved ornaments would not fit on that little tree.  I underestimated how much I loved decorating that large tree.  So that change didn't last.  We have returned to a large tree again,  and I think it was most beautiful tree we have ever had this year.

As I decorate my tree each year, I relive memories of the past represented by each ornament.  Some were given to me by friends or students I taught.  Sometime in years past, I started writing names on ornaments that were gifts.  As I hang each of them on the tree, I visualize the gift givers.  Many of them are still close friends

"An apple for my teacher" ornaments, a sand dollar inscribed "for a special teacher," and "Merry Christmas, teacher"..... I remember the faces of my students as they handed me their gifts.  There is nothing more precious than those little ones who bring their love to their teacher.  Many of these students are now my friends on Facebook all these years later.




Some ornaments were gifts from friends.  Some were handmade like the smocked ornaments made by my sister-in-law.  Some are store bought.  Some are from faraway places.  My friend, Laurie, who knew my love for Key West gave me an ornament from  paradise.  My daughter, Betsey, gave me an ornament years ago from my church, First Baptist Church in Charleston, S. C.





I have ornaments my children made, a baked and painted pink angel Chris made when he was only 3 years old.  I can't believe that one has survived so long....and the felt star Betsey made in kindergarten with a photo glued on... Betsey in the snow.  Then there's the Medieval sword Chris made when he was in Boy Scouts.




But then there are the really special ornaments.  The ones that embody our family history,  the dwarfs that are falling apart now because they are from our very first Christmas together in 1967,

the Christmas mice with Chris' and Betsey's names cross-stitched across the front (Betsey never misses an opportunity to tell me that her name was misspelled).  Roger's mother bought these for them when Chris was 6 and Betsey was 3.

Then there's the ornament my thoughtful neighbor gave me when Jack and Emma were born.... two peas in a pod.... so cute....

the ornament from my childhood, a tin Santa with the paint chipped away,







and the one from Roger's childhood, one of the three wise men....also painted tin.

And sadly, this is the year we lost our sweet Kitty Boy.  We will always keep the ornament that poked fun at his generous girth.....

So, it's over until next year.  Time to pack up and put things away.  Very little decluttering will take place this year where decorations are concerned.  

Jack is only 3, but he feels that let down feeling and said to Betsey, "Mommy, Why did you take the balls off the tree?"  Emma, his twin, is quite practical in her response.  "Because, Jack, Christmas is over."

R. I. P. Kitty Boy, 2000-2014.